Expectations & Realities

Two of my villagers have always told me that they would come to see me in my office one day. They wanted to see how I work in the office. They are eager to watch me working with the professionals.

This is because they have lived with me since my childhood. They haven’t been lucky enough to be in school but they have grown old observing me as a child, adolescent and adult walking to school. During my childhood days, they have watched me walking barefoot. During my adolescence, they have pitied me chewing hardened maize dough with hot chili. They saw me working hard to solve the plus and minus homework given by my class teacher. They saw me walking sadly to school after my father passed away. They found me reading late into the night when all were sleeping. They saw me almost dropping school due to lack of financial support. They have seen me working for the rich to earn expenditure to go to school. They have seen me running up and down carrying loads (that paid a little amount of money) to buy my school shoes. They have seen me drinking porridge during the long days in summer. They have seen me sleeping on the cow skin under a rough blanket woven using nettle skin. They have heard me praying aloud. And they have waited what type of a person I would become.

I was never a strong person to fight ahead in life. My hopes were not high; my dreams not strong! I was just sailing the general motion of the river. Not many people, in the past friom my village, had travelled the road and I did not want to travel the untraveled road. I left it for the wind to carry me where ever it can. And the wind of fate has carried me to this far today.

Today when they hear that I am employed and working in a government office, they are surprised. They never expected me to reach this position. They are appalled. Now they want to see how I live and work with people. I have just completed my university degree but they feel that I am equivalent to Dashos. I tell them that I am nothing in the civil rank. I have just managed to acquire my seat but they think I have achieved great. And for people like us, it is indeed the great achievement.

They imagine me to be living in a big office with huge chairs. But the reality is that I live in a small office shared by other officers. And my office is just located behind the door. When you open the door, you do not see me. If you want to see me, you should close the door and look back. This is where the great people (as assumed by them) live and work happily. I am not disappointed because I do not have a good office. So long as I have the space to sit and work, for the people, I am least bothered of the luxurious office. I believe that I must work with what is available and never have more expectations. Expectations, if not met, brings dismay.

But my two village mates have already developed a high expectation for me. I know they would be disappointed after they see me behind the door. Still then, I have asked them to come to my office any time they wished.